The True Workings Of Kisa Sohma's Mind
by Hatori Ichihara
Summary: What does our sweet little Kisa really think? She blows up her school and starts killing chareacters with the Garden Rock she married. o.0 Chapter 12 up: Final Mission. that's the last chap people
1. Bye Bye School

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket or anything else.**

CHAPTER ONE: Bye Bye School

If there is one thing I hate more than Hiro it's school.

What's the point of school?

Learning? Oh yes, I suppose so... but what do we learn in school that  
is not taught outside?

Se.x Ed... good point

Well, I have made my decision! I, Kisa Sohma, will blow up my school.

It's a simple process yes... very simple.

Let us go put it into action.

-

"What do you mean you don't sell explosives to 12 year old girls!"

How rude of that jerk. He thinks he can take away MY free will to  
destroy education! HAH!

"I heard that..."

whoops...

-

It doesn't matter though. That shop isn't my only source...

-

"Hey Shigure!"  
"No Kisa"

-

Darn. Thrwarted again

** I SHALL PREVAIL **

-

"Hey Haru..."  
"What?"  
"Can I have some explosives?"  
"Sure."  
"THANK YOU HARU!"

-

Haha! Take that Shigure!

"Take what Kisa?"

"Nothing Shigure..."

-

I planted my explosives...

Now I only have to wait...

**_BOOM _**

-

whoo-hoo! My school is now in little pieces!

-

Uh-oh

-

The police found the "Property Of Kisa Sohma" stickers on the remains.

-

Not good...

****

**Please review! I'm in Georgia right now and cannot post this. So Angel  
is doing it for me (THANK YOU) And I have chapters 1-9 written in a   
notebook so far. Thank you for reading and please read Angel's (x Fade  
x To x Black x) fanfictions they're the best!**

_-Selina_


	2. Jail Time

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_Hey It's Selina now! I got home yesterday and decided that now i have the time to type up the rest of my Kisa Sohma chapters! I am also working on a really good TohruAkito fic in the trusty fanfiction notebook haha. please enjoy the chapter. (there are 12 chapters in my notebook)_

CHAPTER TWO: Jail Time

I don't deserve jail!

-

Its day 39 here…

-

Day 39 and 3 seconds

-

Day Forty

-

Day Forty-

"Kisa you've only been here 5 minutes!"

"SHUT UP"

-one

-

"Kisa you can go now."

Finally! After 100 days!

"You've only been here 20 minutes…"

Oh

-

Haru got pinned. The explosives, sticker or not, were registered to him! They think he was trying to frame me!

MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

-

Haru came out five minutes after going in.

He said he made a deal with a female officer there.

-

I found out what the deal was

-

Haru is going to bear the woman's...

Fire arms

-

What else?

-

So Haru has some cool new guns now…

-

Ohhhhhh Hiro!

* * *

please review! i love the reviews and they make me want to type up a new chapters (wink wink) haha

Selina


	3. The Hit List

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_Hey again! I put this chapter up the same night as Chapter 2. When I wake up tomorrow morning I hope to have a nice pile of fresh reviews to get me through the first day of school after spring break haha. Please review I love every review I get so much!_

CHAPTER THREE: The Hit List

I have a new plan now that I am free of my jail cell

-

Kill Hiro Sohma

-

Don't even think of laughing

-

You're laughing aren't you?

-

Oh yeah…

-

Bet you're still laughing

-

OH SHUT UP WILL YOU

-

I asked Haru for the guns

-

He said someone stole them…

-

So I'll ask Shigure

-

"Hey Shigure…"

"Haru got his stolen?"

"Yeah"

"Here. I've only six bullets so take out Momiji too ok?"

"OK!"

-

Woo!

-

Two people on the hit list!

-

You won't believe what just happened

-

Tohru Honda just came over and asked me to kill Akito!

-

Oh yeah I am SO cooler than you!

-

Kyo just came over with a request to kill Yuki

-

There goes fair and square fighting from the stupid cat.

"HEY!"

"Sorry Kyo-Kyo"

"KISA!"

"Heh…"

-

Four people to target! I only have two extra bullets now!

-

I went on my myspace and posted a bulletin for one of the remaining people

-

Some lady named x Fade x To x Black x asked me to kill Akito.

I told her he was taken

So she said I should do in Hatori

-

One more bullet

-

I'm selling it off on ebay now. I'm using Kazuma's account so no-one will know it's me!

-

Someone named The Fall Of The Spirited gave me my final person.

-

Good bye Kyo-Kyo

* * *

now you know the FIRST six people Kisa goes to kill. there will be more, but She starts witht he basics. you'll find out about haru's stolen gun soon enough...

please review i love them all so much :)

Selina


	4. The Setback

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_Whoo-hoo chapter four! YAY please review!_

CHAPTER FOUR: The Setback

I'm loading my gun now

-

Six bullets

-

Six people

-

Whoo-hoo fun!

-

Hiro asked me out

Wow I hate him

-

At least he's dead now

-

Shigure asked about Momiji's state

-

I told him that Momiji was dead in a closet with Hiro

-

I asked to see Akito

Kureno told me that he was out

-

"out"

-

I bet he's off with some random girls

-

So like that idiot

-

"Akito!"

"What?"

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" _BANG_

-

Akito is no more

-

He is joining Momiji and Hiro in the closet… MWHAHAHAHAHA

-

DARN I ONLY HAVE THREE BULLETS LEFT

-

I honestly thought it would take me longer to destroy them…

Oh well, I'm having fun so I can't complain.

-

I wonder who's next…

-

Hiro- done

Momiji- done

Akito- done

Yuki

Kyo

Hatori

-

Since I am at the main Sohma house…

-

OH HATORIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!

-

"Kisa?"

"Yes Hatori?"

"Is that a gun?"

"Maybe…"

"Have you used it?"

"Possibly."

"I need to take it away. You can have it back when you're older."

**NO I NEEDED THAT**

-

This is an unfortunate setback

* * *

please review! 


	5. I'm missing a bullet O M G

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_We're on chapter 5! Please review it really helps:) _

CHAPTER FIVE: I'm missing a bullet… O M G

I have a new idea

-

"Shigure…"

"It doesn't matter to me. Momiji is dead and the world is now at peace."

"Crap."

Should have taken out Momiji last…

-

I need a new gun.

Or I could get the older one back…

"Hatori?"

"When you're older Kisa…"

-

EVIL BAKA HATORI

"Kisa…"

"Sorry Hatori."

-

I guess I'll have to steal it back…

-

I told Hatori to leave the room so that I could search.

He said no!

Can you believe that?

I can't either.

-

He left the room

He said something about someone finding three dead Sohma bodies in a closet.

-

It wasn't me (wink)

Besides, the gun belongs to Shigure HAH.

-

I AM **SO** COOL BWHGAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

"Why are you evil laughing Kisa?"

"No reason Hatori."

-

Shigure is in jail!

-

I have never ever EVER seen Hatori do a happy dance… but I did… and he was in one of Ayame's bikinis.

Yeah… scary images right?

I am a mentally scarred 12 year old…

-

After Hatori's happy dance I got my gun back

-

Poor Hatori…

Poor STUPID Hatori…

-

All I have left now is Yuki and Kyo!

-

Wait a second…

Something….

What on earth?

-

I only have one bullet left…

-

But then… who did Hatori shoot?

-

Oh My God

-

O-M-G

-

It was just announced.

-

Ayame's dead

-

GO HATORI!

-

Wheeeeeeeee

-

Too bad I killed him…

-

Oh well! I need a new bullet… where shall I find one?

-

HAHA! Let's go find SHIGURE!

He lent me one when the cell guarder lady wasn't looking.

-

He has a cell with Haru. So when his sentence is over so is Haru's.

Which I don't think makes much sense but…

-

I shot Yuki!

-

And Kyo was in the middle of thanking me when I shot him too.

-

Well, that's that…

What shall I do now?

* * *

what shall our little kisa do now? mwhahahahahahaha

review please!

Selina


	6. ThE PrEp GoTh QuEeN

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket** _(or the song: "They're coming to take me away hahaa!")_

_my longest chapter yet! with the one character death in this that will make 8 out of the 15deaths in this story. Haru and Kisa dont die... I think if I make a sequal it will be based on what Haru thought throughout the whole thing with Kisa and that will also be 12 chapters. Tell me what you think about that, ok?_

CHAPTER SIX: ThE PrEp GoTh QuEeN

"She's lost it."

"Completely."

Tohru and I are talking. Shigure took Ayame's death hard… But Kagura went completely gothic. She took it hard.

-

Really hard

-

There are a bunch of gothic séance spell ritual things in her room.

-

I know because I stopped by a few minutes ago to ask how she was.

-

She told me she was great and that soon her Kyo-kun would be back with her

-

I called her crazy

-

She drop kicked me out the door to her house

-

Meanie…

-

Oh yeah, I gave the gun back to Shigure

-

I told him it was Hatori who killed Ayame and I killed Hatori for "revenge"

-

He liked that response a lot…

-

I also apologized to Haru…

I seriously hadn't meant to tell everyone (including the police) that he was skipping jail.

(That's how he got back there)

-

"I have an announcement."

"Yes Kisa?"

"I'm going to be a prep goth."

"Ok Kisa… have fun."

I love my mother so much, she's very supportive. (sweat drop)

-

So how does one go "prep goth"?

-

I figure it has to start with how you happen to dress while being a prep goth.

So I am wearing: A black wig with pink bows in the hair. A black shirt and socks, a pink skirt and shoes. My chocker and bracelets are a black and pink mix and my chains are silver with rainbows on them.

-

I look like an idiot

-

Next will be my writing style.

I guess from now one I will have to write LiKe ThIs every once in a while.

-

There….

-

I joined Kagura in summoning Kyo.

He said us and yelled "NO NOT YOU GUYS!" then he dove back into the pentangle we drew on the floor of Hatori's old floor.

-

Meanie.

-

Kagura and I are fighting for the title of Goth Queen.

-

I was going to let her have it and be the PrEp GoTh queen…

But then she went on about how she deserved it more than I did…

-

I will SO win against HER.

-

Poor girl thinks she has a chance at MY title.

"Who thinks who's got a chance for what?"

"Nothing Kagura."

-

I really must stop doing that

-

"Stop what Kisa?"

"SHUT UP! Stop eavesdropping Kagura!"

"I'm not. You're in a public place right next to me yelling."

"………………"

-

Yo. Kagura was just singing in her shower.

-

How DARE you ask how I know?

-

I swear I didn't spy!

-

No seriously, I didn't.

-

STOP STARING AT ME LIKE THAT

-

LEAVE ME ALONE!

-

AGH!

-

"Kisa, what are you yelling about?"

"Nothing mom."

-

She was singing "They're coming to take me away hahaa"

-

Yes…

They ARE coming to take her away hahaa

-

Kagura just umm… _dropped out_ of the Goth Queen competition.

-

She's lying dead on a street corner somewhere

-

I hate competition. (evil grin)

-

I am now PrEp GoTh QuEeN and Goth Queen.

-

WOO!

* * *

please review and tell me what you think of my sequal idea! 

Selina


	7. Operation: Kill Them All

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_mewmewmewmewmew. here's chapter seven please review! _

CHAPTER SEVEN: Operation Kill Them All

I hate Tohru

-

Why? I don't know

-

But since Hiro was shot I've needed someone else.

-

But there's almost no-one left over…

Dead: Yuki, Kyo, Hatori, Momiji, Akito, Kagura, Ayame, Hiro

-

Holy crap, that's 8 people. I only killed seven though, Hatori took care of Ayame.

-

I wonder who really_ is_ left.

-

Tohru, Kureno, Rin, Ren, Shigure, Ritsu

Haru will stay off my list 'cause he's cool.

-

I wonder if I missed anyone.

-

You know…

Maybe….

To pass the time I could just…

Kill them all? (Except Haru CaUsE hE's cOoL)

-

Sounds fun enough…

TOHRU FIRST!

-

Now what shall the murder weapon be? Momiji's adorable sister Momo suggested a large rock. She is tooooooooooo cute to put on my new operation death list.

-

So I'll use a rock

-

Where do I find a rock though?

Maybe…

No.

How about….

No.

-

…

-

…

-

**I'VE GOT IT!**

-

Wait…

Nevermind.

-

How do I get a large rock?

-

I asked Ritsu for one.

He started spazzing out screaming "I'M SORRY! I'M SO SO SO SO SORRYYY! I DON'T HAVE THE ROCK YOU NEED KISA I AM SO SORRY!"

-

To silence him I hit him with a large rock from the garden

-

Wait…

-

I could have used Garden Rocks the whole time!

-

Crap I'm dumb

-

Oh well, Ritsu is off the list…

**Now** I'll go get Tohru!

* * *

yay! now our little zodiactiger has something to do! 


	8. Garden Rock Go Shiny

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket.**

_Woo! can't update for a while because Angel stole my notebook with the chapters in it... meanie. oh well, please review! _

CHAPTER EIGHT: Garden Rock Go Shiny

With Ritsu's death his mom went insane

-

I realize I never added Ritsu's Mom to the list.

I don't even know her name…

-

Maybe I should…

-

Nah, I might get eaten while she's in this state.

-

Tohru is here! I can put my EVIL plan into action!

-

GO PrRp GoTh QuEen and Goth Queen!

-

"Hey Tohru…"

"Oh hey, sorry Kisa I have to go home now… I need to do something."

-

Crap.

-

Darn it!

-

Tohru said she'd come back later though…

-

I took another garden rock.

It's shhhhhhhiiiiiinnnnnnnyyyyy mwhahahhaa

-

Shiny is good

-

Good go shiny

-

(in song) Shiny Shiny Shiny Shiny Shiny… (end song)

-

Ohhhhh yeeeaaahhhh I have to kill Tohru, don't I?

-

Whoops, almost forgot about that.

-

Tohru hasn't come back yet…

-

Yo. It's been two weeks, where's Tohru?

-

Let's try calling:

(calls)

(rings)

_Hello, you have reached the home of _**YOU DAMN RAT** _the umm… Sohma and _**STUPID CAT** _me, Tohru Honda. Please leave a _**BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP TOHRU-KUN IS TRYING TO MAKE THE ANSWERING MACHINE MESSAGE **_err… message and I or Yuki, Kyo or Shigure will try getting _**YOU SHUT UP YOU PERVERTED NOVELIST!** _Back to you as soon as we _**YOU STUPID CAT YOU SHOULDN'T TELL SHIGURE TO SHUT UP WHEN YOU ARE YELLING MOST** _um… can. Thank you and good-_ **YOU DAMN RAT** _bye._

Tohru kept a pleasant voice throughout the whole thing…

-

Um… right then, how about we try instant messenger?

-

PrEpGoThGuRl: yo tohru

Ihatericeballs: ………..

-

No answer… darn.

-

"Kisa you have a letter."

"Thanks Haru."

-

It's from Tohru…

-

Oh my god…

-

You won't believe it:

_Dear Kisa,_

_Heya! It's Tohru. Yes, how are you? Umm… I hope you don't mind but I'm going to go hang myself in a few minutes. I know you wanted to kill me, but this is something I had to do myself. Hope you understand and do not hate me for stopping you from killing me, _

_Tohru_

-

This girl is friggen unbelievable…

-

What should I do with my shiny garden rock?

-

"Let's get married!"

"…"

* * *

please review!

Selina


	9. I dot dot dot My Rock

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_I am SO sorry for not updating much.After chapter 9 we only have 10, 11 and 12 left. So tell me if you want a sequel or not. My other fanfic, Angsting With Akito, is up and very funny. Please review they help me so much with the wrist pains of writing. _

_Selina_

CHAPTER NINE: I … MY ROCK

I love my shiny garden rock

-

Why are you staring at me like that?

-

Hey stop!

-

I SAID STOP

-

Meanie

-

Rock at least understands me.

"…"

See?

-

Those three dots symbolize love.

-

I … my rock. 

-

I'm going on a honeymoon with my rock…

-

I told Kureno that

-

He gave me a weird look and walked off.

Stupid

"Heard that."

"Sorry Kureno."

-

Oh yeah. Only five people left!

Kureno, Shigure, Ren, Rin.

-

Crap. That's four people.

-

Oh well!

-

Those five…errr…. Four can wait until after the honeymoon. (kissy face)

-

…

-

BACK

-

My rock and I went to an ant farm.

-

He's exhausted right now so he's sleeping in my pocket…

-

HOLY CRAP

-

I mean…

STUFF

(starts singing in an annoying voice) _That's a bad word never say it! _

-

MI ROK DISSAPEARED

-

SO DID MY SPELLING SKILLS!

-

I'm so mad about this disappearance…

I could kill

-

Heh

-

Bye bye Kureno

-

Shigure, Rin, Ren

-

I am so good

-

Time to look for some more garden rocks

-

CRAP

-

We're out of garden rocks!

-

WHAT NOW!

-

_**EEP!**_

* * *

oh my, what shall our little Kisa do now?

wait to find out :)

Selina


	10. Can't Live Without My Pineapple

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket.**

_I AM SO SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN A WHILE. I've been having a lot of personal problems lately and have had no time or will to update. I am so sorry. Angsting With Akito chapter 3 is coming along slower than expected. Gomen Nasai... But I am typing up chapter 11 and 12 of this story asI post this. Remember, this story only has 12 chapters pre-written so tell me what you think of a sequel! Should it be from Haru's point of view or a continuation from the end of the story? _

CHAPTER TEN: Can't live without my pineapple

Oh no! What do I do?

-

I know!

-

Wait, never mind…

-

I need a new Garden Rock…

-

I know where I can get a good one!

-

**WAL-MART**

-

But this brings on an interesting question…

-

Are there Wal-Marts in Japan?

-

Well…. THAT'S WHAT GOOGLE IS FOR MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

-

"Why are you evil laughing?"

"No reason Haru…"

"Sure…"

-

Wheeee

-

I found a Wal-Mart!

-

I got:

A garden rock

WebTV

Inuyasha season one on DVD

Some mangas

A pineapple.

-

I can't live without my pineapple.

-

(cries) but not one garden rock in the whole store was as shiny as my original one.

(stops crying) so I got the second shiniest compared to my old rock.

-

These next four deaths…

I'm doing them for…

MY ROCK.

-

How many times must I ask you not to stare at me like that?

-

No seriously…

-

LEAVE ME ALONE

-

Meanies…

-

Either way, I'm going to Ren's Cabin-house-thing right now.

-

Darn, she's not there.

-

Oh yeah, I forgot, she took Hatori's place in the Angsting Club.

-

I guess I'm go find Rin now…

-

Don't you **DARE** forgot I'm prep-goth.

-

Cross that

-

I'm a **PrEp GoTh QuEeN**

-

I found Rin

-

She was with Haru…

-

They were making

…

Cookies.

-

So… I killed two birds with one stone.

Or… rock not exactly a stone but…

-

What?

-

Why am I getting that look?

-

Did I say something wrong?

-

Only Ren and Shigure are left anyway…

-

So I'm going to watch Inuyasha, read some new mangas, set up my new WebTV and continue eating my pineapple.

-

'Cause you know I can't live without my pineapple.

* * *

please review.

Selina-chan


	11. Shigure Was Married! 00

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_This is the second to last chapter... I really need to know what you guys want for a sequel (if you want a sequel) maybe I will just start a chapter 13 after posting chapter 12... I dont know. But I was thinking of doing a slightly more perverted one with another character because after reading Angel (x Fade x To x Black x)'s fanfic on Akito and most of Teh Future Mrs. Kyo Sohma's Yuki fanfic. (Angels was the original. I think mine was second... but it could have been Teh Future Mrs. Kyo Sohma's Yuki one...) I decided that I really wanted to write something perverted... so yeah... just tell me. _

CHAPTER ELEVEN: Shigure was MARRIED! 0.0

Ren is an idiot!

-

She caught the large rock I threw at her and then used it to make coffee!

-

I complained about this to Shigure for whatever reason and he asked me how I knew Ren.

_Flashback_

"_Kisa? How do you know Ren?"_

"_I Googled her on my new WebTV"_

"_Ok."_

_End Flashback_

-

I just realized now…

-

That was a great chance to kill Shigure

-

I went to Google and typed in "Shigure Sohma"

-

I recommend you never do that

-

Ever

-

Seriously yo.

-

I found out some rather _interesting_ facts though…

-

Shigure's gun was actually Haru's. He had stolen it and re-registered it.

-

Another thing I found out though….

-

Shigure was **married**.

-

To…

-

Ayame.

-

I didn't know he leaned that way…

-

But I suppose the hints were there…

-

But they we're good hints!

-

_Flashback_

"_Guys… I'm gay and married to Ayame." _

"_Sure you are Shigure…"_

_End Flashback_

-

Ok… maybe they WERE good hints…

-

Now to go find Ren!

-

"Hey Ren…"

"Who are you and how do you know me?"

"Kisa Sohma. I Googled your name."

"Oh… ok then. Wait a second… aren't you the one a day ago with the roc- **CRASH**"

-

I threw a rock at her.

-

These things really kill.

-

I think I'll Google them…

-

Site: Google

Search: Shiny Rocks

-

YAY!

-

You won't believe who I found!

-

MY SHINY ROCK!

-

I knew it would never betray me!

-

THANK GOD FOR GOOGLE

-

Well, more of a "THANK AKITO FOR GOOGLE" thing for me…

-

But akito's dead so I don't care. (smiles)

-

MWHAHAHAHAHA

-

"Kisa?"

"Sorry Shigure…"

-

Either way…

-

THANK YOU GOOGLE!

* * *

please review and tell me what you think I should do... because I dont have any idea... 

Selina


	12. Final Mission

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket**

_this is the last chapter. i have deicded what i will do. everyone be on the look out soon for the story "In His Thick Orange Head: Kyo Sohma" which will NOT be a sequel to Kisa Sohma, or a run along story. My Kyo Sohma will probably be rated M for all the pervert-ness and language I did not put in this one. please look out for chapter 1 in the next week or so!_

CHAPTER TWELVE: Final Mission

Now that my rock and I are reunited we have our final mission…

-

Kill Shigure

-

I also realized why you were all staring at me strangely before. I had said "Two stones with one bird." But I only killed one person (Rin) and it wasn't with a bird.

-

So… yeah I apologize…

-

Now to tell you all my wonderful plan on how to kill Shigure.

-

Phase 1: I lure Shigure outside

Phase 2: I talk to Shigure about something random

Phase 3: My rock (hiding in my pocket) will pop out

Phase 4: We tie him to a chair and make him eat his cooking

Phase 5: If he's not dead by then we'll hit him with a rock

-

Oh yeah I'm cool.

-

Crap.

-

Shigure dodged the rock and spit out his cooking.

-

He asked why I was trying to kill him.

-

_Flashback_

"_Why?"_

"_Because I'm bored."_

"_Ok."_

_End Flashback_

-

So my rock and I need a new plan…

-

I HAVE IT!

-

MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

-

"Kisa?"

"Nothing Shigure."

-

Hahah

-

Shigure is dead now.

-

I did the simplest thing in the world.

-

I fed Shigure to Ritsu's still nameless mom.

-

I am PrEp GoTh, aren't I?

-

I think I am so PrEp GoTh right now that I will take my shiny Rock out on another honeymoon.

-

Rock: HELP!

-

I … my rock (hearts)

* * *

please review!

(especially YOU angel... she who did not review last chapter lol)

haha,

Selina-chan


End file.
